Great Expectations

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Book by Charles Dickens - Great Expectations, page 19

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discussed around me on all sides, I took another view of the case, which was
more reasonable.
Joe had been at the Three Jolly Bargemen, smoking his pipe, from a quarter
after eight o'clock to a quarter before ten. While he was there, my sister had
been seen standing at the kitchen door, and had exchanged Good Night with a
farm-labourer going home. The man could not be more particular as to the time
at which he saw her (he got into dense confusion when he tried to be), than that
it must have been before nine. When Joe went home at five minutes before ten,
he found her struck down on the floor, and promptly called in assistance. The
fire had not then burnt unusually low, nor was the snuff of the candle very
long; the candle, however, had been blown out.
Nothing had been taken away from any part of the house. Neither, beyond
the blowing out of the candle - which stood on a table between the door and my
sister, and was behind her when she stood facing the fire and was struck - was
there any disarrangement of the kitchen, excepting such as she herself had made,
in falling and bleeding. But, there was one remarkable piece of evidence on the
spot. She had been struck with something blunt and heavy, on the head and
spine; after the blows were dealt, something heavy had been thrown down at her
with considerable violence, as she lay on her face. And on the ground beside
her, when Joe picked her up, was a convict's leg-iron which had been filed
asunder.
Now, Joe, examining this iron with a smith's eye, declared it to have been
filed asunder some time ago. The hue and cry going off to the Hulks, and people
coming thence to examine the iron, Joe's opinion was corroborated. They did not
undertake to say when it had left the prison-ships to which it undoubtedly had
once belonged; but they claimed to know for certain that that particular manacle
had not been worn by either of the two convicts who had escaped last night.
Further, one of those two was already re-taken, and had not freed himself of his
iron.
Knowing what I knew, I set up an inference of my own here. I believed the
iron to be my convict's iron - the iron I had seen and heard him filing at, on
the marshes - but my mind did not accuse him of having put it to its latest use.
For, I believed one of two other persons to have become possessed of it, and to
have turned it to this cruel account. Either Orlick, or the strange man who had
shown me the file.
Now, as to Orlick; he had gone to town exactly as he told us when we picked
him up at the turnpike, he had been seen about town all the evening, he had been
in divers companies in several public-houses, and he had come back with myself
and Mr. Wopsle. There was nothing against him, save the quarrel; and my sister
had quarrelled with him, and with everybody else about her, ten thousand times.
As to the strange man; if he had come back for his two bank-notes there could
have been no dispute about them, because my sister was fully prepared to restore
them. Besides, there had been no altercation; the assailant had come in so
silently and suddenly, that she had been felled before she could look round.
It was horrible to think that I had provided the weapon, however
undesignedly, but I could hardly think otherwise. I suffered unspeakable
trouble while I considered and reconsidered whether I should at last dissolve
that spell of my childhood, and tell Joe all the story. For months afterwards,
I every day settled the question finally in the negative, and reopened and
reargued it next morning. The contention came, after all, to this; - the secret
was such an old one now, had so grown into me and become a part of myself, that
I could not tear it away. In addition to the dread that, having led up to so
much mischief, it would be now more likely than ever to alienate Joe from me if
he believed it, I had a further restraining dread that he would not believe it,
but would assort it with the fabulous dogs and veal-cutlets as a monstrous
invention. However, I temporized with myself, of course - for, was I not
wavering between right and wrong, when the thing is always done? - and resolved
to make a full disclosure if I should see any such new occasion as a new chance
of helping in the discovery of the assailant.
The Constables, and the Bow Street men from London - for, this happened in
the days of the extinct red-waistcoated police - were about the house for a week
or two, and did pretty much what I have heard and read of like authorities doing
in other such cases. They took up several obviously wrong people, and they ran
their heads very hard against wrong ideas, and persisted in trying to fit the
circumstances to the ideas, instead of trying to extract ideas from the
circumstances. Also, they stood about the door of the Jolly Bargemen, with
knowing and reserved looks that filled the whole neighbourhood with admiration;
and they had a mysterious manner of taking their drink, that was almost as good
as taking the culprit. But not quite, for they never did it.
Long after these constitutional powers had dispersed, my sister lay very
ill in bed. Her sight was disturbed, so that she saw objects multiplied, and
grasped at visionary teacups and wine-glasses instead of the realities; her
hearing was greatly impaired; her memory also; and her speech was
unintelligible. When, at last, she came round so far as to be helped
down-stairs, it was still necessary to keep my slate always by her, that she
might indicate in writing what she could not indicate in speech. As she was
(very bad handwriting apart) a more than indifferent speller, and as Joe was a
more than indifferent reader, extraordinary complications arose between them,
which I was always called in to solve. The administration of mutton instead of
medicine, the substitution of Tea for Joe, and the baker for bacon, were among
the mildest of my own mistakes.
However, her temper was greatly improved, and she was patient. A tremulous
uncertainty of the action of all her limbs soon became a part of her regular
state, and afterwards, at intervals of two or three months, she would often put
her hands to her head, and would then remain for about a week at a time in some
gloomy aberration of mind. We were at a loss to find a suitable attendant for
her, until a circumstance happened conveniently to relieve us. Mr. Wopsle's
great-aunt conquered a confirmed habit of living into which she had fallen, and
Biddy became a part of our establishment.
It may have been about a month after my sister's reappearance in the
kitchen, when Biddy came to us with a small speckled box containing the whole of
her worldly effects, and became a blessing to the household. Above all, she was
a blessing to Joe, for the dear old fellow was sadly cut up by the constant
contemplation of the wreck of his wife, and had been accustomed, while attending
on her of an evening, to turn to me every now and then and say, with his blue
eyes moistened, "Such a fine figure of a woman as she once were, Pip!" Biddy
instantly taking the cleverest charge of her as though she had studied her from
infancy, Joe became able in some sort to appreciate the greater quiet of his
life, and to get down to the Jolly Bargemen now and then for a change that did
him good. It was characteristic of the police people that they had all more or
less suspected poor Joe (though he never knew it), and that they had to a man
concurred in regarding him as one of the deepest spirits they had ever
encountered.
Biddy's first triumph in her new office, was to solve a difficulty that had
completely vanquished me. I had tried hard at it, but had made nothing of it.
Thus it was:
Again and again and again, my sister had traced upon the slate, a character
that looked like a curious T, and then with the utmost eagerness had called our
attention to it as something she particularly wanted. I had in vain tried
everything producible that began with a T, from tar to toast and tub. At length
it had come into my head that the sign looked like a hammer, and on my lustily
calling that word in my sister's ear, she had begun to hammer on the table and
had expressed a qualified assent. Thereupon, I had brought in all our hammers,
one after another, but without avail. Then I bethought me of a crutch, the shape
being much the same, and I borrowed one in the village, and displayed it to my
sister with considerable confidence. But she shook her head to that extent when
she was shown it, that we were terrified lest in her weak and shattered state
she should dislocate her neck.
When my sister found that Biddy was very quick to understand her, this
mysterious sign reappeared on the slate. Biddy looked thoughtfully at it, heard
my explanation, looked thoughtfully at my sister, looked thoughtfully at Joe
(who was always represented on the slate by his initial letter), and ran into
the forge, followed by Joe and me.
"Why, of course!" cried Biddy, with an exultant face. "Don't you see?
It's him!"
Orlick, without a doubt! She had lost his name, and could only signify him
by his hammer. We told him why we wanted him to come into the kitchen, and he
slowly laid down his hammer, wiped his brow with his arm, took another wipe at
it with his apron, and came slouching out, with a curious loose vagabond bend in
the knees that strongly distinguished him.
I confess that I expected to see my sister denounce him, and that I was
disappointed by the different result. She manifested the greatest anxiety to be
on good terms with him, was evidently much pleased by his being at length
produced, and motioned that she would have him given something to drink. She
watched his countenance as if she were particularly wishful to be assured that
he took kindly to his reception, she showed every possible desire to conciliate
him, and there was an air of humble propitiation in all she did, such as I have
seen pervade the bearing of a child towards a hard master. After that day, a
day rarely passed without her drawing the hammer on her slate, and without
Orlick's slouching in and standing doggedly before her, as if he knew no more
than I did what to make of it.
Chapter 17
I now fell into a regular routine of apprenticeship life, which was varied,
beyond the limits of the village and the marshes, by no more remarkable
circumstance than the arrival of my birthday and my paying another visit to Miss
Havisham. I found Miss Sarah Pocket still on duty at the gate, I found Miss
Havisham just as I had left her, and she spoke of Estella in the very same way,
if not in the very same words. The interview lasted but a few minutes, and she
gave me a guinea when I was going, and told me to come again on my next
birthday. I may mention at once that this became an annual custom. I tried to
decline taking the guinea on the first occasion, but with no better effect than
causing her to ask me very angrily, if I expected more? Then, and after that, I
took it.
So unchanging was the dull old house, the yellow light in the darkened
room, the faded spectre in the chair by the dressing-table glass, that I felt as
if the stopping of the clocks had stopped Time in that mysterious place, and,
while I and everything else outside it grew older, it stood still. Daylight
never entered the house as to my thoughts and remembrances of it, any more than
as to the actual fact. It bewildered me, and under its influence I continued at
heart to hate my trade and to be ashamed of home.
Imperceptibly I became conscious of a change in Biddy, however. Her shoes
came up at the heel, her hair grew bright and neat, her hands were always clean.
She was not beautiful - she was common, and could not be like Estella - but she
was pleasant and wholesome and sweet-tempered. She had not been with us more
than a year (I remember her being newly out of mourning at the time it struck
me), when I observed to myself one evening that she had curiously thoughtful and
attentive eyes; eyes that were very pretty and very good.
It came of my lifting up my own eyes from a task I was poring at - writing
some passages from a book, to improve myself in two ways at once by a sort of
stratagem - and seeing Biddy observant of what I was about. I laid down my pen,
and Biddy stopped in her needlework without laying it down.
"Biddy," said I, "how do you manage it? Either I am very stupid, or you
are very clever."
"What is it that I manage? I don't know," returned Biddy, smiling.
She managed our whole domestic life, and wonderfully too; but I did not
mean that, though that made what I did mean, more surprising.
"How do you manage, Biddy," said I, "to learn everything that I learn, and
always to keep up with me?" I was beginning to be rather vain of my knowledge,
for I spent my birthday guineas on it, and set aside the greater part of my
pocket-money for similar investment; though I have no doubt, now, that the
little I knew was extremely dear at the price.
"I might as well ask you," said Biddy, "how you manage?"
"No; because when I come in from the forge of a night, any one can see me
turning to at it. But you never turn to at it, Biddy."
"I suppose I must catch it - like a cough," said Biddy, quietly; and went
on with her sewing.
Pursuing my idea as I leaned back in my wooden chair and looked at Biddy
sewing away with her head on one side, I began to think her rather an
extraordinary girl. For, I called to mind now, that she was equally
accomplished in the terms of our trade, and the names of our different sorts of
work, and our various tools. In short, whatever I knew, Biddy knew.
Theoretically, she was already as good a blacksmith as I, or better.
"You are one of those, Biddy," said I, "who make the most of every chance.
You never had a chance before you came here, and see how improved you are!"
Biddy looked at me for an instant, and went on with her sewing. "I was
your first teacher though; wasn't I?" said she, as she sewed.
"Biddy!" I exclaimed, in amazement. "Why, you are crying!"
"No I am not," said Biddy, looking up and laughing. "What put that in your
head?"
What could have put it in my head, but the glistening of a tear as it

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   Monday 20 May, 2013